Facie’s Ramblings

This election season, which pretty much started 3 years ago, has been particularly contentious. I can't believe we have another almost 7 months until the general election and then another almost 3 more months until the inauguration. Lord, help us. But what bothers me even more than the bitterness, hate, and name-calling is when people say things like this on Facebook: "If you support _____, unfriend me right now."  If you have just met me or read my blog for the first time, the best way I can describe myself is a liberal Republican. Facebook reminded me a few days ago that my hubby had called me a "bleeding heart liberal" 2 years ago. Not surprisingly, my liberal friends were pleased and said things like "what a compliment" and "thank him." In fact, only one conservative friend made a comment, which was "If the shoe fits..." As I have said several times here, my (somewhat confusing and conflicted) political leanings ofte...

Once again I have slacked off with posting. I did write about/sing the praises of RiverQuest, an educational boat ride on the North Shore, so please check that out in my previous post below! Anyway, here is what has been going on in my life since last time. J is done with 5th grade. Hooray. This was a tough year for a number of reasons. She had a lot of HW up until the end; she had only one homework-free weekend the entire year, which I disagree with. She also was no longer friends with the group of friends she had been (their friendships ended at the very end of 4th. Looking on the bright side, we saved some money by missing out on birthday invites, and I did not and will not have to worry about taking time off work to get her to various gatherings held during the week. :-)  I tell J that I went to an even smaller Catholic school and also did not have a lot of friends, but high school and college were different, each better than the previous. Things are still going well at ...

Yesterday, I met with about 15 former coworkers from the job I was at the longest (almost 13 years). About once every year or two, someone sends out an email and tries to gather together as many people as possible for an afternoon or evening on the South Side of Pittsburgh. Although I could not tell you how many coworkers I had at that job (in 13 years, a lot of people come and go), I am lucky to say that I worked with a lot of great people over the years. And even though I keep in touch with a only a handful of them on a regular basis, it sure is nice to see some "old" faces every now and again. And speaking of old... I missed the gathering that was held in 2012. So the last time I saw most of these people was in the summer of 2011. And it could have even been 2010, as the years seem to run into each other. A few people I had not seen since I left that job (five years ago Thursday!), and one person I had not seen in probably several years before that. Most everyone loo...

I am convinced I have one of the shortest memories. Before I accepted my current job, just before Easter last year, I thought (and by thought, I really mean fretted) about summer child care, which was something I had not had to think about ever. J started out at an at-home daycare when she was about four months old and she continued going there until she went to kindergarten. I was out of work a few months before kindergarten ended, so summer care was not an issue. But this spring, we worried and searched and ended up finding a place for J to go to this past summer with with we were mostly happy. And then school started back up again, where J also attends after-school care five days a week. So I thought we were all set. Yes, there are days off here and there throughout the school year, but between my job's nice holiday time off and a friend and a few relatives, we work it out. It helps that we know about those days at the beginning of the year. But this week, we had something w...

This evening, after hearing the kid whine about something, I wearily begged her to stop, saying that no one likes a whiner. J's response, which I have heard all too often lately, was that I don't like her for who she is. Sigh. I love my child more than anything and, like most parents, more than my life. I genuinely want to be with her as much as possible (which is why for the first time in four years I am sad that school is ending). But the kid can whine better than a three-year-old, and it is getting old. And when she says to me that I don't like her, or even that I don't love her, I reply, just as my one grandmother often said, "I love you, but I don't like some of the things you do." But that is almost not the point (though if you have any suggestions for how to get her to stop whining, I am all ears). My larger concern is her lamenting that I (and others) don't want her to be herself. I tried to explain, as best as I could, that there are thi...

Yesterday, I nearly finished a lengthy blog post, but then decided against posting it because it was focused on things that made me sad, which is going against the way I am trying to be. Then I took one piece of that post, and worked on that a bit, but that topic was too distressing. Last evening, as I was reading some article about a prison guard being attacked, I thought about writing a more lighthearted post about jobs I would never want to have. But I never actually put fingers to keyboard. So this morning, after being awake way too early, I decided to write about something more personal but hopefully not so negative: friendly relationships I am grateful that I have a handful or more of "true" friends who I know like (or at least accept) me for who I am, with all my faults and quirks, and whom I can trust. If I had only one or two of these people in my life, I would be luckily, but (yeah me!) I have more. Next there are those who although might not be the people I can ...

I have been thinking about forgiveness lately. I know some other bloggers have blogged about it (I forget which ones; I read too many), and I have commented on various posts. I also have discussed the topic with friends and family as of late. So it was fitting that forgiveness and reconciliation were the topics in yesterday's church reflections group I often attend. For years I used to think you could not forgive someone unless that person said he was sorry and truly meant it. Many people can do the former but not really mean it. And then one can be sincere in his apology, but continue to do the same things over and over. As a result, I had trouble forgiving some people for their wrongdoings. Over the years, and particularly in the past year, I have come to realize that sometimes we must forgive others for our well-being; it may not have anything to do with what they have said or (failed to say), but rather how we feel. According to Psych Central, forgiveness is letting go o...

One of my favorite blogger friends, Bluz, over at Darwinfish 2 , recently posted about his four-year blogiversary. I recall thinking at some point in either December or January that January 2008 was when I started this blog, but, surprise, surprise, I forgot about it when the actual time came. Regardless, five years is a long time to be doing something like this, for me, anyway, so I do want to acknowledge it. Yeah, me! My original intent for this blog was to post things about my kid, mostly pictures, so my brothers and their families would be able to keep up with us. Because they live too far away! But right from the get-go, my first post had very little to do with the kid, other than I posted a picture of her and the dog (I cannot believe how little my J looks in that pic). That post was a bit disjointed and lacking focus. The next one I titled "True Ramblings," yet it actually was not all that rambling (unlike many of my subsequent posts). Worth noting is I did not cap...

Last evening, the mother of one of J's classmates passed away. This woman had been sick for quite some time (really her daughter's entire life), and her health had recently taken a turn for the worse. However, when I had spoken to her last week and the week before, she sounded pretty good, even optimistic. To help makes things easier for the family, I was planning to take her daughter and J swimming today, and we were going to finalize the plans yesterday. Unfortunately, because this woman had gotten so sick over the past few days, my conversation with her on my birthday was the last we will ever have. Sigh. In my opinion (and the opinion of many others) the worst thing that can happen to someone is to lose her child/ren. But a young kid should not have to lose one of her parents either. To a kid, that is the worst thing that can happen. I remember one time as a child my brothers and I were supposed to spend the weekend at my grandmother's, about an hour away, and I refus...

I spent chunks of time today writing a post on this morning's Race for Pace. I would add more details and then take something way. Ultimately, I ended up boring myself, which means I would probably put most of you to sleep. So here is an abbreviated post, in a list. It was probably about 35-degrees at race time, but sunny (it was 29 degrees when I got there 45 minutes earlier). My attire of a long-sleeved t-shirt, a windbreaker, yoga pants, socks as gloves, and a knee brace (one of those flexible-stretchy things) from early this century turned out to be the right wardrobe. I was relatively pain-free the entire time (knee brace was a good call); even my feet hurt very little (though during the first mile, two of my toes were numb from the cold!) I started off strong, kept a pretty steady pace, struggled a bit near the end up the last hill, but "kicked it in" as best as I could the last tenth of a mile. Having my friend Diane there cheering me on really helped. As I ...

J survived her first week of fourth grade at her kind-of-new school (two other schools merged with hers). And I survived a week of lunch duty, which I can now smile about. Change is hard for most of us (I am looking right at you, self!). And when many people have to do something completely different, with dozens upon dozens of new faces, in a place they are not used to, well, you should not expect sunshine and lollipops. At least not every day. After my first day of lunch duty this week, I wanted to cry. It was chaotic at times. There are 140 more students than there were last year, and of those students, probably 160 are new to me. So I cannot call many of them by name to get their attention or correct them. In the case of the last lunch (there are three), I have no idea who is in what grade since they can sit wherever they want, which means I often don't know if the correct kids are heading out to recess (we call them a grade at a time). Throughout this week, I saw some kid...

One of my favorite TV lines, from one of my all-time favorite TV shows (Friends), is Ross's whiny but emphatic "But we were on a break!" Blog readers, a break is just what I am going to go on. I have no idea how long this break will last. Chances are good that something (probably Penn State-related) will come up that will lure me back to this place before too long. But my goal is to step away for awhile. This blog has helped me work through some things. This blog has let me capture some of life's events. This blog has also allowed me to get to know people. But lately I have just not been feeling it. I want to be able to say and share more, but I can't, mostly because I keep hearing my mother warning me to stop posting so much about my life. And I am trying so hard not to be negative and judgmental, but blogs seem to bring those very things out. So I bid you adieu for now, on Sidney Crosby's birthday (happy 25th!). And in case I am not back for awhi...

I really could not decide on the better post title to aptly describe the blogger dinner I went to Saturday night, so I used them both, probably creating the world's longest blog post title! Considering this is going to be a long post, it kind of makes sense. So here is how it went, blow by blow (get your popcorn ready): Brian thought with the nearly always awful traffic on the Parkway East combined with a Pirates game and a closed exit that I should leave at 4:30 for the 6 p.m. dinner. I figured that 4:45 would be safe. In reality, even with a traffic backup at the North Shore, I was driving past the restaurant at 5:20. Unfortunately, the restaurant is BYOB and does not have a bar, so I had a dilemma. After driving around for six or seven minutes, I noticed a bar a block or two up the street, so I parked near it. As I was walking to the bar, I thought back to a time in '94 or '95 when I walked into a bar near the campus of IUP one weekday afternoon. I had hoped and ass...

It's funny (and not funny, ha ha) how when you have a baby, you think that it cannot possibly get any harder than this, with the lack of sleeping and the constant worry about almost everything. But as your kids grow up, you realize just how easy you had it back in the day. This morning, I read an article about a mother who choked the boy who was bullying her daughter. Before I even read past the headline, I found myself almost siding with the mom. I would never do anything like that; after all, I am the one, unlike hubby, who tells my kid to turn the other cheek. But I can see how as a parent you could become so frustrated, worried, angry, etc., that you could be pushed to that point. As both a parent and educator (albeit not too regularly for the latter), bullying concerns me. It is sometimes difficult to determine when it is just teasing/being mean and when it has gone beyond that. Of course it would be great if everyone just got along all the time and no one was ever mean t...

After an embarrassing layoff in my thank-you note project ( my last note went out over two months ago), I am happy (well, more like relieved) to report that I wrote two notes over the weekend. Note 1 This one went to the woman who pretty much runs the lunchroom. She updates the schedules for the monitors and kitchen helpers, which is a feat in itself considering it is next to impossible to get four or five parent volunteers every day. Part of that task includes sending emails begging people to volunteer because if there are not enough monitors, then the kids cannot go outside for recess. But wrangling the kids is the most difficult task. She has to move the line forward, keep the cafeteria down to a dull roar, and dole out discipline as needed. And that is just during the eating portion of lunch. While outside, someone almost always falls down, throws a ball at someone else too hard, or does not share a jump rope or other toy, and she has to deal with that as well (more so than thos...

When I refer to TMI, I am not talking about people sharing (often gross) things they probably should not. But rather sharing a friend's or a relative's personal information with a spouse or significant other. I know people who have cheated on their spouses, had abortions, have been raped or victims of domestic violence, committed (minor) criminal acts, did not disclose things to the government that they should have, suffered from various mental aliments, and who have been drug addicts or alcoholics. In most cases, I have not shared that information with Brian unless the person told me I could or I felt he needed to know for family safety issues (e.g., you have to consider who you let your children around). I am certain he would think less of some of these people if he knew things they did, so what purpose does it serve telling him? But more importantly, I want these people who confide in me to know they have my word. I can honestly say I don't think I can trust any of ...

Yesterday, I sent out my third thank-you note for my thank-you note project . This one went to a woman I met four and a half years ago when our daughters attended the same preschool and then the same kindergarten (they were in the same place, the same room, actually). I really like R; she is younger than me, though we have the same birthday, and she seems to be a good, loving, caring mom to her three kids. She seems sincere, and she is not one of those gossipy women. We have managed to stay in touch over the years, though because of her work schedule and large (to me, anyway) family, we don't get together too often, which is a shame because Jordan really likes her daughter, who is sweet and quiet, just the kind of friend you want your kid to have. I decided to send R a note because, as a real estate agent, she has been sending me housing information to help me fight my assessment case. As I ranted about a few weeks ago , our assessment went up even though we live in an area where...

I am still trying to get the nerve to write a post about my failings as a parent. Just not there yet. But for everything I do wrong and for all the times my kid acts like a teenager, it is nice when J does something that shows me I must be doing some things right. As I have blogged about before, some of J's classmates have been mean to her and have excluded her, which, I know, is pretty normal for kids. Fortunately, she is rarely fazed by this, mostly because she is oblivious. I, on the other hand, continue to let this get under my skin, mostly because my kid goes to a Catholic school, so one might expect the kids to be kind, Christian-like. You know what I am saying? One of J's best friends, whom I will call Kelly, happens to be loved by pretty much all the kids. Kelly is a pretty nice girl, fairly quiet when I sub, and, even better, has never been disrespectful to me, unlike far too many others.  Yesterday when I picked J up from school, I asked her whom she sat with a...

This post is kind of like a "Random Ramblings" post (interesting that I just capitalized the "r" in "Random" when I refuse to use initial caps in my blog or post titles), except it is specific to things as of late that either I don't get or I find interesting. Here goes: With all the technology out there, one might think (one being someone other than I) that when you click on the "Find product in store" icon on a company's website, and an "in-stock" notation pops up for a selected store, the product might, oh, I don't know, actually be in said store . Since I am not "one," I don't think that to be true. Mostly because it has not been true for Walmart, Target, and Walgreen's the few times I have used this feature in the past 30 days. Third grade seems a little young to have an i-Phone, don't you think? Well, I do. But apparently quite a few parents of other third graders do not agree if I can believe ...

I like to celebrate a birth weekend or a three-day birth anniversary whenever I can. Why limit yourself to just one day out of 365?! So, of course, in advance of today, the big 4-0, I decided to start my celebrating on Saturday. It started off on a small scale. I took Jordan to the Home Depot for one of those kids' workshops. With no hammering and a few screws, it was right up my alley. And, I was able to lift and carry the full propane tank back to the car, so clearly I am not over the hill! We followed that up with a quick trip to Kohl's, where I treated myself to a new wallet. Even waiting in a 20-person-deep line could not dampen my spirits, what with my happily telling the two people in front of me and one behind me that I was turning 40 on Monday. Yesterday was the real highlight. With my Steelers Santa cap and Hines Ward jersey on and my Terrible Towel in pocket, I headed downtown, where I got to park for free! I had a nice walk across the Roberto Clemente Bridge and...