Facie’s Ramblings

Another month has passed without my blogging. I (sometimes) long for the days when I would blog several times  a week. I am just in a weird place now, and I am not sure blogging will help. Plus with the rather boring life I lead, there really is not much to say. But I will try to say a few things that are on my mind. The Steelers are the playoffs! I used to be so excited by that. And I am still a little. I will certainly be watching the game. I am wearing my Hines jersey as we speak. But I no longer get really worked up by a game. I don't cry when my team loses a big game. I no longer post a lot about the Steelers as I used to on Facebook and a little on here. This season is the second in a row I did not go to a single game, which is now my longest streak. My family got season tickets when I was in high school (can't remember when). I went to a game or two a year then. In college, I probably went to only one per year. Once I graduated and up until I had Jordan 10 years later,...

I have a handful of thought in my head (and by a handful, I think I mean about 30). So rather than try to pick one topic, I am going to bullet point some. Let's see how many "some" actually ends up being... When the Penguins are done with hockey, so am I. I am not even sure who is still playing and if we are down to the final teams. I think the Rangers are or were in it. But that is all I know. I really like hockey, but as a true Pens fan who watches pretty much every single game, starting in October, once the Pens are done, I typically have had enough. Let the record show that I rarely complained this winter. So many people talked about how hard/bad the winter was. I did not see it that way. I am guessing that is because I drove to work this winter, unlike last winter, when I found myself waiting for the bus in frigid temps quite a bit. Even 5 or 6 minutes in windchills at -5 or even 0 degrees tends to bring you down. So this winter was like a picnic in comparison. I...

In more than one blog post, I have talked about my failings as a parent. I don't know how specific I have gotten. But one of my failings has really come to light lately. Well, I guess it is really two related things, which can be summed up with two phrases: too much and not enough First of all, I do too much for my kid. I complain about and to J that she does little, but I never seem to follow through. For many years, she has taken her dishes to the kitchen after each meal, which was more than my brothers ever did when I was in charge of the dishes beginning in 4th grade (yes, I remember that). But that is usually where it ends. Then again, my hubby has trouble locating the dishwasher, so she may get it honestly (note that the hubby really does a lot of stuff; he just can't seem to open the dishwasher). Tonight I had her sweep the floor, and it was painful to watch. Which was exactly how it was when I asked her to do this a month ago. I guess I just don't have the patienc...

Ten (nine, oops, bad math) years ago, I celebrated my first Mother's Day. I don't actually remember a thing about it, including where I was or whom I was with. My mom may or may not have been working (if the latter, then I was not with her). I may have been here with the hubby, the kid (who was a baby at the time), and most likely my MIL. The hub's grandmother was still living in SC with his (now deceased) grandfather, so they probably were not there. We could have been at my MIL. Or, actually, we could have been at the hubby's restaurant (or maybe he was no longer there). Yep, no clue. What I do remember is the Mother's Day before that. I, just over five months pregnant, took my mom to Heinz Field for a brunch. When we arrived upstairs, the hostess was handing out these nice, thick hardcover Steelers books to the moms. She asked me if I was a mom, and I recall touching my stomach and saying, "In utero!" Fortunately I got the book. :-) I don't remem...

I have "written" versions of this post in my head many times. In fact, if I went back and looked, I would probably discover most of it in an older post. But since I don't feel like trying to figure that out and because this is what I am thinking about now, I am just going to put it out there now. Not well written, but, to quote one of my favorite sayings, it is what it is. I cannot seem to go more than a few days without lamenting that I have only one child. This was a mostly intentional decision, mind you. Brian and I had said we would have another child once we sold our house and moved into another. But we tried the house selling in 2007 and 2008, and got nowhere. By the fall of 2008, I really did not want another child, so I gave up that thought. I still don't want another child. Really. But much like some (many?) childless people, I wonder if I won't regret having an only child down the road. There are many days when I think about it. My kid is stuck with ...

On more than one occasion, I have blogged about my having only one kid and the grief that has caused me. Grief is really a strong word, but I don't know which word is the right word. Having one kid was a mostly intentional choice. Years ago we had decided that once we sold our house and moved into our larger one, we would try to have another kid. But we put our house on the market a year later than we anticipated, and by that time, I had gotten over the desire for another kid. Good thing, because we are still here in this same smallish house, in this crappy, crappy school district! Most days I am glad that I am able to devote myself to my one child; she does not have to share my affection with anyone else. But, as I have mentioned countless times here and to others, it can be difficult being your child's playmate. I can take only so many Barbies, babies, and princess play times. I can never say, "Go play with your sister." But I love reading to my kid and enjoy most...

As you may already know, I am pretty much a helicopter parent. There are a number of reasons for this, including that I had overprotective parents and that I am the parent of only one child. I am really trying to be less insane about my hovering, and reading the Free-Range Kids blog has helped. However, I have to comment, in true helicopter parenting style, on one of their/its recent blog posts. The abridged version of this post is that a free-range mom (FRM) wanted her 9 year old kid to walk home alone from his friend's house two blocks away, something the kid wanted to do as well. The helicopter mom (HM), however, refused to let said boy do so, and had a woman who was visiting her home (a woman FRM knew) drive FRM's kid home. FRM wants to know what to do/say next time as HM disregarded her wishes. Here are my thoughts, some of which I included in a comment on the FRK's site: We are free to raise our kids as we wish. The FRM can tell HM that she wants her kid to walk...

I am not big on confrontation. Sure, if I really told some people what I thought about them, particularly when they are speaking their mind to me, I might feel better. But probably only temporarily. I am much more about keeping the peace and turning the other cheek. But just once, here are some of the things I would like to say to people who ask me why I have only one child: I don't ask you why you are fat, so how about not asking me why I have only one kid. Yours might be due to a medical condition, just as mine could be. Why assume otherwise?And if not, you may like to overeat, and I may prefer the benefits of having one kid. To each his own. I don't ask you how many people you have slept with or why you are so rude, so how about not asking me such a forward, personal question. You seem to have trouble with the kids you already have, so why would I want to risk putting myself in the same situation? You are often asking people to watch your kids so you can go out and have fun....

Today the St. Vincent de Paul society became the recipient of numerous baby paraphernalia. We said good bye to the swing, stroller, infant and toddler car seats, bouncer, high chair, crib music thing, and numerous other items that Brian put into boxes and bags. The fact that I have been referring to Jordan as an only child over the last couple of months prompted this, but had we not put our house back up for sale (after being off the market for about six months), I probably would have held on to these things for at least another year. The reality is even though money and that I am just not into babies (that is, I don't really want to have a baby) are big factors in our decision to have just one kid, as significant is that I am selfish. If you have been my friend for years, you know how self-centered and absorbed I can be, how I think my problems and what goes on in my life are so significant. And with one child, you can still be a little selfish. Don't get me wrong, Jordan is f...