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The road to hell is paved with good intentions

At one time, I was one of the most thoughtful people I knew (or so I thought). I never forgot a birthday (I am still good about that). I wrote thank-you cards right away (I seem to recall baby and wedding shower ones being written in a week and wedding ones getting done in three, and that was only because the honeymoon got in the way). I found the right words to say when a loved one of a friend died. But then something happened, and it all went to hell in a hand basket.

Probably at least once a month I think about a thank-you note that never gotten written for a gift from Jordan's one uncle (Brian's mom's brother) and aunt. From December 2006. Because Bri's mother and her brother don't talk all that much, it was thoughtful for them to send Jordan gifts the first few years of her life. Yet, for whatever reason, I never sent a thank-you note for that gift, although I still contemplate writing one, thinking it is never too late. And I give them credit; since then, they've never sent Jordan another gift. I am fond of that tactic, having done that with various cousins over the years.

Then there is a friend from college who had twins in late April. She and I have barely kept in touch since I had Jordan. A few emails and a Christmas card throughout the year. But we were good friends at one point, so what is my excuse for not getting those babies a gift? Actually, at first, it was because I wanted to buy a Babies R Us gift card at Giant Eagle (fuel perks), and they were out for several weeks. Then I just stopped thinking about it. I fear they may be walking before they receive something from me.

I was invited to a wedding for a couple in my church choir last month. When I sent my regrets and then a follow-up email, I warned the bride that I was lousy at getting gifts (for a party/event I end up not going to) and that they might receive their wedding gift in time for their first anniversary. That may be a self-fulfilling prophecy, although part of me does think I can go out and buy something before choir starts up again at the end of the summer. I swear the lack of gift has nothing to do with the invitation being address to Mr. and Mrs. Brian (my last name), although as you can imagine Bri did not want to go after that (we did have plans).

My old babysitter, who the family still keeps in touch with, had a stroke last month. Do you think she received a card from me? Nope. How hard is that to do, for the love of Pete. This woman is in her 80s and was a like a second mom to us.

And I found out a few weeks ago that an acquaintance from the alumni association, someone who was on my cell phone speed dial years ago, has leukemia. No card for him yet either, which seems inexcusable. Even though I have not seen him in years, how sad is it that I cannot be bothered to pen a few sentences.

My one uncle's mother passed away a few weeks ago. That aunt remembers Jordan for every holiday. Yet no sympathy card from me. At least I emailed a former roommate whose grandmother died.

Finally, Jordan worked on a nice thank-you card for an aunt who so thoughtfully sends Jordan clothes her granddaughter outgrows. But I am just too lazy to find a big enough envelope and address it.

What is wrong with me, I ask?! Am I the most pathetic soul out there? Please tell me someone else is on this same, destitute path.

Okay, I just wrote that thank-you note (from 2006) to Jordan's (Brian's) uncle and aunt. They will probably think I am insane, but I have to do it. Hopefully, I will actually mail it. I have $.39 stamps, which is probably a good indication that I don't mail things on a regular basis. Sheesh.

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