Skip to main content

Something(s) good out of something dreaded

It is hard to believe another year has passed since the day that probably 99 percent of the women out there dread. Oh, how I loathe my annual exam, but I am happy to report that two things happened to make it not so awful this year.

Through the apparently thin walls, I could hear the heartbeat of an unborn baby.

I have no idea what that instrument is called (the one that allows you to hear the heartbeat of an in-utero baby), but as I heard that sound from so long ago, my eyes immediately watered. The memories of that whoosh-whoosh-whoosh noise, from over eight years ago, came flooding back, and I was immediately reminded of the first time I heard Jordan's heart beating from inside by stomach. At the time, I had no idea what the sound was, and I had to ask the nurse if that was my baby's heartbeat. She said yes, and my eyes welled with tears.

I also remember the next time, when it took awhile for the instrument to pick up Jordan's heartbeat. I was supposed to get a sonogram that day, and for a moment, I was utterly panic-stricken, thinking my baby was not okay. I remember Brian had a pretty concerned look on his face. But then came the whoosh-whoosh-whoosh sound, the tears started flowing, and I thanked God.

Yesterday, I tried to imagine how the pregnant woman in the room next to me was feeling, assuming she was pretty happy. Maybe relieved. Perhaps even scared. But, man, it really is something to hear. (And, no, it did not make me want to have another child.)

The other thing that made me smile?

The doctor asked me how I stayed so thin.

Unfortunately, my weight was up a few pounds since last year, and I told the doc (technically, a CNM) I would like to drop a couple (enough to put me safely back on the other side of the 150 notch). The doctor then said she had no idea where I would lose that weight from. I contemplated jumping up and hugging her, but, considering the (ahem) position I was in, I opted not to. Regardless, even though I am fairly comfortable with my body (those two pounds not withstanding), it was nice to hear her say that.

Of course this trip did not end without a minor irritation, in the form of a specialist copay. Last year, I ranted about my having to pay a $25 copay instead of a $15 one, because apparently my annual exam was considered a specialist visit. I disagreed that there was anything special about my visit, and one of my readers disagreed with me. Ultimately, I ended up with a $10 refund a few months later, which I assumed was because I was right.

Well, we all know what happens when you assume.

I guess I will just have to wait to see if I get a refund this year. After all, I was seeing a certified nurse mid-wife, not a gynecologist, so one would assume she would be considered less of a specialist than a gynecologist.

Okay, I am done assuming now.

Comments

LaLa said…
I don't think any woman looks forward to her annual exam. At least not any NORMAL woman. Good that you found that silver lining. Hope the copay works out.
Facie said…
LaLa: Somehow I just know that there has to be a woman or three who really don't mind what I consider torture. Maybe the overstressed parent who knows she is getting away from the kids for an hour?

I keep meaning to call about the copay thing, but what that person said last time did not seem to be true, so why bother.

Popular posts from this blog

What a year 2021 has been (Day 7)

I have almost no words for what happened yesterday at the Capitol. Protesting is one thing (though I truly think it is and has been time to move on). But to storm the Capitol? A friend on Facebook said, quite simply, " Almost 20 years ago a group of people on an airplane sacrificed themselves to protect the Capitol. How far we have fallen!" Indeed. And, yes, it IS storming the Capitol. I have seen numerous videos of people knocking down barricades/fences, pushing police officers, and breaking windows and climbing through them. That is beyond protesting. And even if a protestor did not do those things, if they followed those seditionists past those barricades and into the building, they are just as guilty. I did not support the violent protests this summer that resulted in damages to businesses and public property (I was in full support of the actual protests). But I also acknowledged as a white person, I cannot truly put myself in the position of a black person who is angry a

Melancholy and Gratitude

 A few days ago, I decided to do gratitude posts on FB. I was good the first two days. Day 3 I got a little snarky as I posted about "doing the right thing" in regards to Covid. The Covid cases in Allegheny County have been on the rise. For a while, we had daily counts between 50 and 100. After July 4, we saw a spike for a few weeks, and then cases were back below 100. Unfortunately, other than one "low" day this week, where "only" 288 cases were reported, we have had between 500 and 620 daily cases. Fortunately, only a few people have died this week. But of course, any death is too many. I started to keep track of cases, deaths, and hospitalizations on 6/12/20. On that day, since 3/12, Allegheny County had had 2,034 cases, 352 people had been hospitalized, and 172 people had died. On 11/19/20, the county has seen a total of 22,042 cases, 1,724 people have been hospitalized, and 465 people have died from Covid since 3/12. In just over 8 months, we have had

Hug your loved ones!

I hate to say that I am still working through my grief. I mean, in some ways I can imagine I will always be grieving. But I feel pretty confident it will get easier, and I will cry less and less. But, yeah, I guess I am still working through it. Yesterday, a thought occurred to me: I had not hugged my dad since the end of February, and that will now be the last time I ever did. I did not see him for almost three months because of COVID, and then at the end of May, he started his series of hospital visits with skilled nursing stints in between. I was always afraid to hug him then. What if I gave him COVID? And yet when my dad had really bad ICU delirium during a few different hospital stays, I fed him. If I could do that, why not hug him? So I cried a bit last night thinking about that. I am not necessarily a big hugger; I used to hate it, and then probably before Jordan was born, I got back to doing it again. Before COVID, I hugged my friends goodbye (and sometimes hello). I always wou