In BC (before child) times, weddings were almost always fun. You were typically surrounded by numerous friends or relatives. You "got your groove on" (at least I always did). You imbibed (often over-), ate well, and generally were merry. And the occasion was happy. Two people in love, vowing to spend their life together. On that day, all seemed right.
But this weekend, rather than looking forward to witnessing the joining of two people, I am instead watching two people say good-bye to their spouses. If you are keeping score, Grandpa (Brian's grandfather) died at the end of September, and his service was three weeks ago today.
This week my uncle's father passed away (my uncle is married to my mom's sister, lest any of you think he is my grandfather). I had seen Glen over the years at family functions, and I know how well loved and respected he was, so I felt the loss, particularly for his family. On the very same day, Aunt Dodo, the oldest of my mom's siblings, passed away. She had had MS for many years, and her health had been deteriorating over the past year. Last week, she had slipped into a coma just as Grandpa did. Not the kind of deja-vu you appreciate it.
Just as I did at Grandpa's service last month, I sang for Glen yesterday; and tomorrow, I will sing for Aunt Dodo, which will undoubtedly be the hardest of the three. The memories I have of Aunt Dodo are many. What stands out for me most is before doctors determined she had MS but when she clearly was not well, she would not leave Erie (where she lived). But when I got engaged, she vowed to be there; it gave her a goal. And she did come, which was the advent of many trips down this way, most recently on Labor Day weekend.
Years ago, I would tell people I had sung at/for four weddings and a funeral (you might recall the movie by that same name), which I thought was kind of cool at the time. At some point, I got a few more weddings under my belt, so that phrase no longer applied. But for some reason, I never sang at another funeral after I had sung for my grandma almost 20 years ago. Until three weeks ago. And here I am again. Sigh.
I hope this occasion can serve as a celebration of Aunt Dodo's life as well as a reminder of how fragile life is. You just never know when your time will come. I can also, selfishly, hope, I won't be singing at any more funerals for quite awhile, and not just because no one asked me...
But this weekend, rather than looking forward to witnessing the joining of two people, I am instead watching two people say good-bye to their spouses. If you are keeping score, Grandpa (Brian's grandfather) died at the end of September, and his service was three weeks ago today.
This week my uncle's father passed away (my uncle is married to my mom's sister, lest any of you think he is my grandfather). I had seen Glen over the years at family functions, and I know how well loved and respected he was, so I felt the loss, particularly for his family. On the very same day, Aunt Dodo, the oldest of my mom's siblings, passed away. She had had MS for many years, and her health had been deteriorating over the past year. Last week, she had slipped into a coma just as Grandpa did. Not the kind of deja-vu you appreciate it.
Just as I did at Grandpa's service last month, I sang for Glen yesterday; and tomorrow, I will sing for Aunt Dodo, which will undoubtedly be the hardest of the three. The memories I have of Aunt Dodo are many. What stands out for me most is before doctors determined she had MS but when she clearly was not well, she would not leave Erie (where she lived). But when I got engaged, she vowed to be there; it gave her a goal. And she did come, which was the advent of many trips down this way, most recently on Labor Day weekend.
Years ago, I would tell people I had sung at/for four weddings and a funeral (you might recall the movie by that same name), which I thought was kind of cool at the time. At some point, I got a few more weddings under my belt, so that phrase no longer applied. But for some reason, I never sang at another funeral after I had sung for my grandma almost 20 years ago. Until three weeks ago. And here I am again. Sigh.
I hope this occasion can serve as a celebration of Aunt Dodo's life as well as a reminder of how fragile life is. You just never know when your time will come. I can also, selfishly, hope, I won't be singing at any more funerals for quite awhile, and not just because no one asked me...
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