Facie’s Ramblings

A handful of years ago, my attention span was greater. I looked forward to blogging regularly as well as reading blog posts of various people. But then at some point, FB took over that space in my brain, and because I had so many posts to keep up with, blogging and reading others' blogs took a back seat. I eventually started to tweet, but I mostly reserve that for commenting on or about sporting events, which I don't do with any sort of regularity. Mostly because Twitter is so in the moment; I can never keep up. But my lack of blogging means my writing skills have languished. When you type only a few sentences at a time, you can't expect greatness. And when you realize you don't have much to say beyond 6-10 sentences, but when you know that whatever can be said will take you double or triple the words necessary, well, that, folks is why I hardly blog. That and that my life is pretty boring. (Unless semi-regular Phipps flower and my dog and cat posts on Instagram excit...

J is in sixth grade. She is of an age when most kids do not believe in Santa. In fact, I would guess in her class pretty much no one does; most kids gave that up in fourth grade, some as late as fifth grade. But J? Well, on my birthday last week, after she found out there was no elf that flew away each night and came back every morning (because she straight-out asked me, and I will not lie), I figured she might have stopped believing in the fat guy in the red suit. But she is my daughter, so I knew there was an even better chance that she figured that just because one thing was not true, that did not necessarily mean the other mythical creatures were not real. [When, sometime between fourth and fifth grade, I found out there was no Santa, I refused to ask my parents about the Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy. Even though I knew they probably were not real either, I decided to hold onto hope and get one more holiday out of it.] Yesterday, I took J to the Santa breakfast at our church becau...

Sometimes Person A will tell you something that happened, which happened to involve Person B. And then Person B has a slightly different take on it. Both believe their version is the truth. Whom do you believe? There are people in life who lie. This happens pretty much every day, particularly with politicians. I am sorry to say, but at this point I almost refuse to believe anything that comes out of an elected official's mouth, regardless of political party. Sometimes they are just going with the whole CYA strategy. Other times they might actually be convincing themselves that they have it right. Maybe their fingers are crossed? We also see this with (mostly college) coaches. How many of them say that this is their dream job and they are here for the kids. And then a few weeks or months, or maybe even a year, later they have found another "dream" job. (I do realize people can change their minds. And, yes, I am speaking about Penn State, now that the tables are turned ...

One of my favorite blogger friends, Bluz, over at Darwinfish 2 , recently posted about his four-year blogiversary. I recall thinking at some point in either December or January that January 2008 was when I started this blog, but, surprise, surprise, I forgot about it when the actual time came. Regardless, five years is a long time to be doing something like this, for me, anyway, so I do want to acknowledge it. Yeah, me! My original intent for this blog was to post things about my kid, mostly pictures, so my brothers and their families would be able to keep up with us. Because they live too far away! But right from the get-go, my first post had very little to do with the kid, other than I posted a picture of her and the dog (I cannot believe how little my J looks in that pic). That post was a bit disjointed and lacking focus. The next one I titled "True Ramblings," yet it actually was not all that rambling (unlike many of my subsequent posts). Worth noting is I did not cap...

If you have been reading this blog for awhile, you know that honestly and doing the right thing are common themes. They are things I ponder more than occasionally. I have never served on a jury, and I hope I never have to. Why? Because other than with my own child, I am not very good at discerning the truth. For the most part it is because I am extremely honest (and open, for that matter), and I tend to think/hope that everyone else is too. For me that means that almost every time someone lies or is telling a half-truth, either I refuse to believe said person is lying or I am genuinely surprised that that person is lying. So how I am supposed to determine someone's guilt or innocence? Let's say Man A said that Man B shot Man A in cold blood/in an attempt to kill. Man B said the shooting was in self-defense. Someone is lying, and I doubt I would be able to figure it out. And what bothers me even more is what if I am wrong? You can say that you make your decision based on the...

Some of the kids in J's class have an "Elf on the Shelf." For the uninformed, an elf show up at children's houses around Thanksgiving. This guy or gal "lands" someplace and "watches" the kids to see how they act. Then at night, while the kids are sleeping, said elf "flies" back to Santa to give the big guy an update. The elf returns the next day, in another place in the house, and the Big Brother saga starts again. I wanted no part of this. Mostly because half the time the Tooth Fairy forgets to leave money or the Easter Bunny accidentally neglects to hide the eggs (because she is so tired from the 2.5-hour Easter vigil). But perhaps even more so because it is just one more "lie" I am telling J. And if there is one the thing my kid pretty much never does it is lie. So I can only imagine how our conversation will go once she finds out the cold, hard truth. Worth noting, is I often quote lines from the Virginia letter; I like to...

By now I should be tired of all the negative political ads that I am being bombarded with. But because Penn State continues to remain at the forefront of local and, to a lesser extent, national news (Paternoville is now Nittanyville! Take the statue down! Camp out to defend the statue! The Paternos are conducting their own investigation! The Freeh Report is biased! Joe Paterno is a child rape enabler!), the ads are not affected me as negatively as they have in the past. Yet. I read yesterday that Romney is outspending Obama. I was extremely surprised at this nugget. I would have put the ratio of Obama to Romney ads at about 4 to 1 in western PA, which would lead me to conclude the opposite. Because isn't PA supposed to be a battleground state? If so, why is it that it appears I am seeing mostly the mud-slinging by Obama's camp? Maybe this just occurs on the stations I am watching, but if any of you is seeing a lot of Romney ads, I would love to hear. But speaking of mud-sli...

I spent almost three hours last evening reading the Freeh report. Hubby asked why I would waste my time doing so, and I said that as a Penn Stater and someone who has given Paterno the benefit of the doubt, I needed to read it. Too many people were commenting in various places without having read more than the press release or parroting what others have said, and I didn't want to be one of those people. Unfortunately, I am one of those people who are having trouble putting all my thoughts and opinions into coherent statements. In fact, I have edited and pretty much changed this post three times. What follows is rambling and disjointed, which is due in no small part to my difficulty in wrapping my head around so much information and trying to reconcile that with my wanting to think the best about people. :-( Do I feel differently since yesterday, when based on the press release and some of what I had read, it appeared that JoePa knew more than he let on? Not a lot. In fact, he and...

I am unsure how many times in my life I have questioned why people do the things they do. I have probably done it in this blog a half dozen times or more. I know I wrestle with this at least weekly. I get that people have free will. Any one of us can decide on any given day, hour, or minute whether we are going to do something good or something bad. Something that will help others or something that will hurt others. Something that is "right" and something that is oh-so-wrong. I realize that most of us don't generally do really good or really bad things; we just live our lives. Sometimes we perform a random act of kindness and we are hopefully mostly nice to our family and friends. Other times we say something unkind, are not truthful, and do things we probably should not. But the truth is, I grapple with those little wrongdoings as much as I struggle to wrap my head around the really heinous things people do. Yesterday a man walked into Western Psych, a hospital/ins...

Late this afternoon my (mostly) lovely eight-year-old and I were lying in my bed reading. J, a biography about Ben Franklin for a book report and I, a trashy magazine my MIL gave me. At one point, J told me that she did not understand something. Now this book was geared towards fourth graders, at least according to the library. But since the book is almost 15 years old, what was considered fourth grade then is pretty much third grade now, so I thought it was just right for her. And it certainly did not seem above her reading level, except for a few words here and there she could not pronounce. But, no. J was not struggling with a word. Rather, J looked at me, read the phrase "because he had gotten a girl pregnant" aloud, and then asked, "How do you get a girl pregnant?" What?!!!! My heart started pounding, my face got red, and I started stuttering. I think I said something like, "That is a good question. Hmm. Uh... Well... You know, it is hard to expl...

When I refer to TMI, I am not talking about people sharing (often gross) things they probably should not. But rather sharing a friend's or a relative's personal information with a spouse or significant other. I know people who have cheated on their spouses, had abortions, have been raped or victims of domestic violence, committed (minor) criminal acts, did not disclose things to the government that they should have, suffered from various mental aliments, and who have been drug addicts or alcoholics. In most cases, I have not shared that information with Brian unless the person told me I could or I felt he needed to know for family safety issues (e.g., you have to consider who you let your children around). I am certain he would think less of some of these people if he knew things they did, so what purpose does it serve telling him? But more importantly, I want these people who confide in me to know they have my word. I can honestly say I don't think I can trust any of ...

A few days after the Penn State story broke, I was reminded of something in high school, something I have probably not thought about in over or at least close to 20 years. Something quite honestly I would rather forget. But even my sorry memory still works every now and again. When I was a senior in high school, a friend of mine told me her stepfather was molesting her. When this memory came back to me, I immediately felt guilty. I questioned why I did not tell a teacher or my parents. Was it fear? Was I thinking I was somehow protecting my friend by keeping quiet? I honestly don't recall if she asked me not to tell anyone, though I am guessing probably. This friend was close to a teacher, whom I seem to recall she told. It seems likely I thought that since he knew, I did not need to get anyone else involved. I also remember that my friend was seeing a therapist, so maybe at the time I figured what else could I do. But if I have learned anything from the sordid Penn State story...

I still have so many thoughts swarming around my head regarding the Jerry Sandusky-Penn State scandal, but I cannot take the time to write them all down. And there is no way anyone would want to read paragraph after paragraph even if I could. So let me briefly (for me) sum up my thoughts as of right now. The whole situation is sad. So incredibly sad for the kids, but sad for others too. Sad for the people who thought they were doing the right thing but may not have been. Sad for the people who should have done more and probably knew it. Sad for the reputation of a great school. Sad for coach who did so much for a university. Sad for the fans. Sad for the students. Sad for the community. Sad for sports. Sad for parents. Just sad. I know that Joe Paterno needed to no longer be the coach. I had hoped he would have stepped down on his own, but he did not. I know PSU's cutting ties with him is the right thing to do, but that does not mean that it is not sad. I hate that this is ho...

Before I launch into my thoughts about the scandal at Penn State involving former assistant (until 1999) football coach Jerry Sandusky and the apparent cover up (at least ignoring) of Sandusky's sexual abuse of youth, let me say that unlike many alumni, I cannot personally be embarrassed by something involving my alma mater when I had nothing to do with what happened. I am still Penn State proud, though a little less for sure. Now on to the story... The 23-page attorney general report on Sandusky in graphic detail recounts how a respected man sexually abused eight youth over the years and next to nothing was done to either stop it or keep it from happening again. It is pretty sickening. Throw in a dozen other news stories, blogs, and comments from various people and you find your head spinning as you try to figure out what really happened. Here are some of my thoughts: I understand it was a report and not a trial, but the stories of eight youth as well as the eye witness...

If you took the time to read my last blog post, then thanks. It was a long one. For that reason, I am going to summarize my latest thoughts, which come on the heels of my meeting with the teacher, in the next two sentences to spare you from reading the four paragraphs that follow: I am about 95 percent sure my child is telling the truth for all the reasons I stated in the last post. However, 5 percent of me still cannot understand/believe that two different girls would make up things about my child. I know I should probably just drop it. Move on. But as I said to Jordan, if I knew that someone said that I did something which I did not, then I would want to confront that person. I know I am not eight, but why is my kid not more bothered that another girl is supposedly making up things about her? Jordan said she does not want to talk to the girl because she is afraid the girl will then tell the teacher that Jordan is bothering her or threatening her. Valid points, I realize. But the...

This is another of those posts that may end up being two parts. It will be lengthy. Can't forget lengthy. Earlier this week I received an email from my kid's teacher saying she wanted to discuss some behavioral issues. Even though the teacher said it was nothing "earth-shattering," I worried for several days until we finally talked. Here is my best attempt at recounting what is going on. My kid, following the heels of negative comments that a couple of other kids made, told a girl that she had no friends. Jordan said the girl made a similar comment back to her, and Jordan insists she then told the girl she was just kidding. This story came from Jordan; the teacher told me that she did not know the details since it happened during another class. The teacher was able to tell me this: After that incident, this girl told the teacher that Jordan hit her with a hula hoop and told the girl if she told on her, Jordan would say the girl hit her first. The girl also said ...

So another Steeler is in trouble. Sheesh. Unfortunately, this time the offender happens to be my favorite player, Hines Ward. He whom I voted for on "Dancing with the Stars" many, many times. He of the only Steelers jersey I have ever owned. He whom I waited in line for an hour or so back in 2002 to have him sign said jersey. [Note: I generally disdain the whole autograph thing, but I made an exception because I owned his jersey, he was making an appearance 10 minutes from my house, and PSU was losing the football game I was watching at the time.] But back to issue at hand. A few nights (well, early mornings) ago, Hines was pulled over for driving erratically. When the story first came out, his agent/manager said Hines was not impaired while driving. But according to the police report, his eyes were bloodshot and glassy, he failed some field sobriety tests (alphabet, walking and turning, standing on one leg), and he registered a .128 on a portable breathing test (he refused...

Coming on the heels of my last post, I have another customer service issue. Except this appears to be less about customer service and more about my being a woman. Today, I brought my car into Monro for my 8:30 a.m. brake appointment. When I made the appointment yesterday, I explained that my brakes have been squealing for the past couple of months, and more recently, they have felt spongy. Today, J, the store manager (the same guy I spoke with yesterday) again asked me what was happening with my brakes, and I repeated the information. I also added that when I had my car inspected at my "regular" mechanic's back in December, he said that my brakes should be good for a few more months. [As an aside, at that inspection, I told my mechanic if my brakes were "close to failing," he should replace them because I would rather have new brakes through the winter. My mechanic said my brakes still had some tread and replacing them would be like throwing out half a loaf of...

Those of you who know Amy of Callapitter probably are aware of the hands-on design meeting for Kate and Peter's Treehouse this Thursday. If not or if you are interested in learning about the meeting and the project, check out the link here . For this particular meeting, the planners are interested in the input of children since they will be the ones using this park. And because Frick Park, where this space will be located, is one of Jordan's favorite parks, I thought it might be a good idea for the two of us to attend. Plus I just want to support Amy, for all that she has been through. Jordan did not know Kate and Peter; they were in different classes while in Beulah. For that reason and because, as I have mentioned in several posts, Jordan has struggled with death in the past, I never bothered to tell her about them. Until now. I figured if I was going to take her to this meeting, I should probably give her a heads up. Otherwise, she would be asking questions there and mig...

I have a bunch of thoughts swimming around my head. But since they center around things that are currently perplexing and/or bothering me, I am forgoing a "random ramblings" post title. Here goes nothing. I love Joe Paterno. But I am not sure if he should keep on coaching. On the one hand, he has done so much for the school, and he really is a great, funny (at least he was when I met him about eight years ago) guy. But on the other hand, considering he is almost 84 and seems to have lost a bit of his step, shouldn't he hang it up? Is there an intelligent reason that about 13 million people are still paying off last year's Christmas purchases? I saw this stat on the local news and was appalled. Other than someone's buying a car or perhaps a computer, IMHO there are no other purchases that should not have been paid off within a few months (for the record, if I get to the point where I have to carry a credit card balance, it would not be for gifts, but I am tryin...