Facie’s Ramblings

If you have been reading this blog for awhile, you know that honestly and doing the right thing are common themes. They are things I ponder more than occasionally. I have never served on a jury, and I hope I never have to. Why? Because other than with my own child, I am not very good at discerning the truth. For the most part it is because I am extremely honest (and open, for that matter), and I tend to think/hope that everyone else is too. For me that means that almost every time someone lies or is telling a half-truth, either I refuse to believe said person is lying or I am genuinely surprised that that person is lying. So how I am supposed to determine someone's guilt or innocence? Let's say Man A said that Man B shot Man A in cold blood/in an attempt to kill. Man B said the shooting was in self-defense. Someone is lying, and I doubt I would be able to figure it out. And what bothers me even more is what if I am wrong? You can say that you make your decision based on the...

I heard today on the Fan radio station that it takes some people weeks to get over a big loss like the Super Bowl. I don't think even in my most devoted, fanatic days it took me more than a few days, thankfully. When the game ended on Sunday night, I was fine. Really. Honestly, I had felt a little guilty throughout the game, thinking how it is kind of unfair that the Steelers were in the Super Bowl for the third time in six years, and that they (we!) had won it two times in four years. Shouldn't someone else get a turn? Of course, that is not how it works. Life is not always fair. Clearly I should never coach or own a sport teams. Etc., etc., etc. But I went to bed happy for the Packers. Unfortunately, I woke up once in the middle of the night, remembering that the Steelers lost, and I felt a little sad. When I woke up for good the next morning, after 7:30 a.m., thanks to that stupid two-hour delay, I thought about the "things always look better in the morning" ph...

This holiday season (for the record, I am referring to it as the holiday season because Christmas does not start until December 25 and it seems a little too narrow to refer to it as Advent), I am doing just what I said I would not. Well, I am doing what I said I would a few weeks ago, which is embracing the season . I listen to Christmas music every day in the car (mixed in with some sports radio, of course). I am trying my best to be extra pleasant to people while waiting in long lines. More often than usual, I let cars in traffic get in front of me. I have worn my various Santa hats (PSU, Steelers, red) several times , including yesterday during lunch duty. I bought a gift for the angel tree at church and have given a donation to the food bank. And I finished my Christmas cards before Thanksgiving and painstakingly waited to send them out until November 29 (just could not wait until December 1). The thing that I did not want to do was get caught up in the presents, which is exact...

In some ways, I feel as if my life is ruled by guilt. It is a sad way to be, really, as I find there are few things I do in life because I really want to. I sing in my church choir during the school year, which involves a couple hours of practice during the week plus a few more on Sunday. I enjoy doing this, but it takes me away from my family, although I am mostly okay with this smallish commitment. On the other hand, my choir also has additional concerts, practices for those concerts, fundraisers, etc. I participate in the fundraisers because I feel guilty if I don't; I certainly wouldn't want someone to think I am not pulling my weight. Some extras I go to and feel bad because I am missing family time and other extras I skip and I feel bad because I think I am letting my small choir down. I have been invited to countless things over the past few years. I go to as many as I can, because I don't want to let people down, particularly when it involves friends I don't see...

I suffer from working mother's guilt. People who know me well (and probably even some who don't, because I am just that open about things) understand that I do not see myself as stay-at-home mom material. For years I was not sure I wanted a child. But when I found out I was pregnant (well, five minutes after anyway), I knew there was nothing I wanted more than to have this baby. But stay at home? Even if I thought I fit that mold, with Brian's new restaurant (and no paycheck) at that time, I had to work. But even though I did not think I could be with my child 24/7, which I know sounds kind of sad for a parent, I also knew I did not want to work five days a week either. Luckily I was able to work out a four-day a week deal, though not without a struggle (you would swear I was the most valued employee with the grief I got). Having done this routine for four and a half years, I can tell you I wish I would have asked to work three days, although I probably would not have been ...